When I was in the pits of despair after having my first born I was DESPERATE to hear people’s journeys OUT of depression, sadness and overwhelm.
Instead people seemed to revel in telling me how much worse everything was going to get as my baby grew up. How the teething was going to keep me up all night, how she’d eventually climb out of her bed, how she’d have a million accidents and grow to resent me with the teenage years. Just when I thought it couldn’t get worse, I realised there were more problems to worry about. I knew that for me to break free of the depression I needed to focus on the positives. There had to be some! Surely people had children for a reason beyond succession of their genes.
But at the time it seemed that as soon as I overcame one hurdle, another appeared. When I asked Google I found a tonne of mum discussion groups but it was just more talk about more problems and more future things to worry about.
I craved a place where I could find some positivity and hope around parenting. I needed to find a safe place where I could read authentic stories about motherhood which covered both the good and the bad. I needed to read storied about women, who like me, were either struggling with some sort of shock, or anxiety or depression surrounding birth and motherhood. I needed and wanted to have discussions about how to make things easier, how to possibly make things better and more enjoyable. I’m definitely one for a good moan, and I definitely think there’s a place for that, but there’s also a time and place for positivity.
Surely people had overcome postnatal depression and anxiety. How had they done it? I felt sure I could learn from them. Perhaps what worked for them would work for me? Maybe it would just give me a bit of hope and peace that things would improve for me? Maybe it would give me ideas about what I could try? Maybe one solution doesn’t work for everyone? Maybe it would be interesting to hear how different women found different ways out of ‘the pit’?
So, here it is. because I can’t find it anywhere else I’ve created what I needed. I find the stories utterly inspiring. I hope you do.
I have been overwhelmed with the kindness of other women willing to share their stories. I have littered the blog piece with helpful quotes and positive imagery to highlight how truly beautiful everything can get. A reminder and a glimpse into how real life; your life, my life, a life of you sister/ friend/ Auntie can turn out. That we need help to keep focused and reminders that WE matter, that honest talk about our feelings amongst supportive people helps and that getting the right help and support is critical.
Motherhood has of course been hard work for me, but never did I realise it would be this wonderful. I wish I had only known how good it was going to get.
In this section of the blog we’re focussing on how mothers have improved their lives postnatally and where they are now in their journeys. What resources they used and how helpful they found them. It is an unbiased selection of deeply personal accounts of women’s journeys out of the trenches and back into the light.
My intention is that it brings hope and inspiration to women who can’t find it at that moment for themselves. We all need people ahead of us to light the way, to hold our hand to say we’ve been there too and promises that things will get brighter and better.
Please click through the stories that resonate with you (coming soon!). Maybe you yourself are struggling or maybe someone close to you is. Perhaps you might light upon a useful resource or idea of what to try or perhaps it will change your perception on people who take medication or see a counsellor.
I hope that this opens conversations and gives people insight and ideas for moving forwards positively with more hope and confidence.